Hiya everyone, I need to keep on top of my blog I have been letting it slip recently and I feel kind of bad about it. I just wanted to talk about the last couple of weeks for me as they have been a bit of an emotional rollercoaster I have had amazing highs and pretty crappy lows it's all been a bit tiring and confusing so I thought I would give everyone an update on what has been going on.
Anyone who has been following my blog will know it was my birthday at the end of last month and there were so many emotions surrounding that day for me anyway I didn't want to be agoraphobic on my birthday and also turning 19 made me realise that the years are literally passing me by and I feel as though I am not moving forward. Anyway my birthday came around whether I liked it or not and I was surprised by how different I felt. My birthday party proved to me that I did have friends and family around who cared for me and it gave me a bit of a boost and from that day I started venturing out more, not without hiccups but I felt a lot braver. I had my family and friends supporting me at all times and I felt on top of the world. Then for no reason I just came crashing back down again.
It was about 11pm and I just felt extremely sad all of a sudden for no reason, I think it might have been because I was on my own again, my family had gone to bed early as they were going back to work and my sister was starting college and I have found that I don't do too well on my own.
From that day on I just felt miserable like I didn't want to get out of bed or see anyone, my best friend even came over until 4am one morning to sit with me but I just couldn't cheer myself up I was feeling angry at myself and let down which made everything seem a lot worse.
I have kind of been up and down now for the last couple of weeks but I am hoping to get back on track again soon I am too determined to give up this time. So that probably explains why I haven't been updating my blog much I have just been going through a bit of a rough patch but I feel better after getting things off my chest.
Emma
xx
x
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